rossk14's Xanga

When you leave the cover off the brownies you just fuck it up for everyone else.

Tue, 21 Feb 2006 04:28:07 GMT

I love brownies. They taste good with just about every beverage known to man save tomato juice. Just thinking about those yummy chocolaty squares brings a smile to my lips. But do you know what doesn't? Assholes who have the time to grab a brownie out of the fridge but don't have the time to replace the foil, that's what. How much time does it really take to replace the fucking foil. (That's retorical)

Some people may say that brownies are cheap and a couple of wasted brownies is not worth even half the f-bombs i've dropped so far... those people don't know a fucking thing about brownies; they never loved a brownie and i'll bet therefore never loved life or anything about it.

I concede that brownies are cheap. A box of brownies is 2 bones... add 2 eggs, 1/2 cup of cheap oil and some water and you've got one of the cheapest treats available. Sure, i suppose you could class up your brownies by using Fiji or some fucking expensive water instead of the free stuff from your tap. But why when the preservative filled, overprocessed chocolaty goodness kills the taste of absolutely anything you mix with it? You could also waste 5 dollars on a box of something purporting to be the best browny ever made. Don't, just get the cheapest fucking box of brownie mix you can find, generic if possible, they're the best. But i'm far from my point now...

So, if not for the cost, why am i so upset at 50 cents worth of wasted chocolate powder??? Because i Love brownies and when i go to the fridge i want a chewey piece of chocolaty goodness and not some crunchy, tooth-wrenching piece of crap.

In conclusion, what is sooooo fucking important that you need to grab a brownie and rush out the door without covering the remainder back up? I posit nothing, absolutely fucking nothing. It take 30 seconds out of your life and it means so much to everyone else in the house. Just fucking do it.

Sincerely,

Your Roommate

I just washed my hair for the last time in 2005!!!

Wed, 28 Dec 2005 18:42:04 GMT

So, i just received the hippest haircut of my entire life! If i had a camera or camera phone i'd post it, it's just that good! I had grown the hair for so long that my hair dude couldn't bring himself to cut it all off like usual. I now look like an emo-rocker.

So anywho, i'm stoaked about the new hair, and about the fact that i'm not allowed to wash my hair until after new years!!! Can you believe that shit! I'm sure you can.

peace,

lamey lamerton

(i'm so hip i can't stand myself)

Battered Drunk Syndrome

Fri, 16 Dec 2005 18:22:01 GMT

Ummm... I'm lame and i did a quiz, here's the results:

YOU ARE RULE 8(a)! You are Rule 8, the most laid back of all the
Federal Rules of Civil Procedure. While your
forefather in the Federal Rules may have been a
stickler for details and particularity, you
have clearly rebelled by being pleasant and
easy-going. Rule 8 only requires that a
plaintiff provide a short and plain statement
of a claim on which a court can grant relief.
While there is much to be lauded in your
approach, your good nature sometimes gets you
in trouble, and you often have to rely on your
good friend, Rule 56, to bail you out.

Which Federal Rule of Civil Procedure Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Okay, another piece of exciting news... Last weekend i totally learned about torts first hand!!!
Saturday evening after my first exam, Civ Pro, i was drinking with my law school superfriends for about 12 hours when a couple of us decided to go to a bar. As we were leaving the bar, some dude said something as we passed and i naturally retorted "your mom." Just that, a little "your mom".
Anywho, he ended up following us to the car. I thought i explained to dude that i wasn't going to fight him; apparently i said, "hey, punch me in the face when i get into my car;" so that's what he did, and then hauled ass. No blood, no foul; good times.

My friends can't believe that i was assaulted; i can't believe that they think i was assaulted when i was clearly battered :) I clearly deserved to be punched.

Last thought: four classes down, one to go!!! Bring on second semester!

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Wed, 10 Aug 2005 19:08:43 GMT

In a 1986 letter regarding abortion bombings, future Supreme Court justice John Roberts' [was linked to a memo containing the sentence]

"No matter how lofty or sincerely held the goal, those who resort to violence to achieve it are criminals."

Check out the whole letter here.
I'm guessing that he exempts the current President's penchant for solving his problems with violence. For shame.

[whew, that was a close one, i need to check my facts better!]

Thursday, June 30, 2005

Thu, 30 Jun 2005 18:05:18 GMT

No beer? Then lunch is off, Belgian official says.

I've had yummy Belgian beer so i know exactly where the esteemed gentleman is coming from.

In other news, thanks to this website i may never be without my favorite beers again!

Thursday, June 30, 2005

Thu, 30 Jun 2005 17:51:57 GMT

I would like to clear up some confusion:

George W. Bush is NOT a Cowboy.

Cowboys round up cattle and take them on cattle drives from one place to another.
George W. Bush does not drive cattle; he owns a ranch.
Cowboys drive cattle; ranchers own ranches.
George W. Bush is a rancher, not a Cowboy.
Thank you.

For a quick reference, here are the lyrics to Willie Nelson's
My Heroes have Always been Cowboys:

I grew up a-dreamin' of bein' a cowboy, and Lovin' the cowboy ways.
Pursuin' the life of my high-ridin' heroes, I burned up my childhood days.
I learned of all the rules of the modern-day drifter, Don't you hold on to nothin' too long.
Just take what you need from the ladies, then leave them, With the words of a sad country song.
My heroes have always been cowboys. And they still are, it seems.
Sadly, in search of, but one step in back of, Themselves and their slow-movin' dreams.
Cowboys are special with their own brand of misery, From being alone too long.
You could die from the cold in the arms of a nightmare, Knowin' well that your best days are gone.
Pickin' up hookers instead of my pen, I let the words of my years fade away.
Old worn-out saddles, and 'old worn-out memories, With no one and no place to stay.
My heroes have always been cowboys. And they still are, it seems.
Sadly, in search of, but one step in back of, Themselves and their slow-movin' dreams.
Sadly, in search of, but one step in back of, Themselves and their slow-movin' dreams.

And Mama's don't let your Babies grow up to be Cowboys, because i loves me some Willie:

Mama don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys
Don't let them pick guitars and drive in old trucks
Make 'em be doctors and lawyers and such
Mamas don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys
They'll never stay home and they're always alone
Even with someone they love
Cowboys ain't easy to love and they're harder to hold
And they'd rather give you a song than diamonds or gold
Lone Star belt buckles and old faded Levis
And each night begins a new day
And if you don't understand him and he don't die young
He'll probably just ride away
Mama don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys
Don't let them pick guitars and drive in old trucks
Make 'em be doctors and lawyers and such
Mamas don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys
They'll never stay home and they're always alone
Even with someone they love
A cowboy loves smokey old pool rooms and clear mountain mornings
Little warm puppies and children and girls of the night
Them that don't know him won't like him and them that do
Sometimes won't know how to take him
He's not wrong he's just different and his pride won't let him
Do things to make you think he's right
Mama don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys
Don't let them pick guitars and drive in old trucks
Make 'em be doctors and lawyers and such
Mamas don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys
They'll never stay home and they're always alone
Even with someone they love

Thursday, June 23, 2005

Thu, 23 Jun 2005 19:19:33 GMT

While i'm here, if you liked Freedom Fries, you may want to check out this link: http://nofrance.info .

Thursday, June 23, 2005

Thu, 23 Jun 2005 19:14:34 GMT

I don't usually support the libertarian agenda but after checking out this Scary Article I may have to start. According to the courts you can kiss your personal land rights good-bye. I would like to propose that this has nothing to do with communism, where the government would take your land and declare it public. The following quote demonstrates that this is something totally different, taking your land and delivering it into the hands of another private owner. I think it's sad that the court equates the two.

"The majority held that, just as government has the constitutional power of eminent domain to acquire private property to clear slums or to build roads, bridges, airports and other facilities to benefit the public, it can sometimes do so for private developers if the latters' projects also serve a public good."

Damn this governement for making me a free-marketeer.

Sunday, May 22, 2005

Sun, 22 May 2005 17:29:20 GMT

Judeo-Christian Revisionist Deconstruction Criticism of a Winnie the Pooh tale

First, a little setup - If you've read my first entry then you know that i'm an asshole who missed my friend's daughter's second birthday. i went up there this weekend to make amends; she totally stonewalled me, except to ask for animal crackers. She then made her dad, myself and her aunt watch Winnie the Pooh. We became quite bored and took to discussing the greater meta-physical meaning in the tales. Here's the content of our mental exercise.

The Story: Tigger bounces into Rabbit's garden destroying his carrot patch. Rabbit, Pooh and Piglet conspire to take Tigger into the woods and lose him. After loosing him Rabbit loses his way back. Tigger goes into the forest to retrieve Rabbit who then has a humiliating ride behind a bouncing Tigger back to the house.

The Players:

Christopher Robbin: The Creator. It is Christopher Robbin's imagination that gives life to the animals. (There was talk of his Character in the book, the one that interacts with the stuffed animals as if they were alive as being a Jesus figure, but that's for another discussion.)

Rabbit: Antagonist. Dislikes Tigger and conspires to get rid of him.

Tigger: Protagonist: Likes to bounce. Hero; saves Rabbit from his own undoing in a poignant work of irony.

Pooh & Piglet: Unimportant co-conspirator's with Rabbit.

Analysis:
Tigger represents an Abel character, reminiscent of the character in Genesis, son of Adam. Christopher Robbin loves the Tigger character. It is the will of Christopher Robbin that Tigger should attain to anything that makes him happy and is therefore complicit in the destruction of Rabbit's garden. Tigger acts without malice and is held blameless by Christopher Robbin.

Rabbit, while a creature of Christopher Robbin's own creation, does not trust his creator and has therefore created a garden to provide sustenance for himself which is subsequently destroyed by the carefree Tigger. To see the relationship between Christopher Robin, Tigger and Rabbit, think "Tigger i have loved, but Rabbit i have hated." Rabbit plots the demise of Tigger, again showing his lack of trust in the judgements of Christopher Robbin.

Though we don't see the explicit involvement of Christopher Robbin in the climax of this tale, we see that his will is eminently victorious in the dramatic turn of events in the finale leading up to the embarrassment of Rabbit.

Conclusion:
Don't fuck with Christopher Robbin.

Saturday, May 21, 2005

Sat, 21 May 2005 17:06:33 GMT

Today i played the first round of frisbee golf of the year! It was super fun. I had to stop keeping score at the 11th pin though; i was playing pretty badly. To say i sucked might be going too far, but my score up to the 11th was par for the course; deduce from that what you will.